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Bullying Behavior Causes Children to Be Insecure


Alex looks calm, tends to be patient, and can adapt to the situation in his class. He is quite independent in completing the tasks assigned by the teacher. This is a good thing that Alex can do while participating in learning activities at school. But in the association with friends, Alex tends to interact less with many people and prefers to be passive. He doesn’t like to start a conversation and prefers to wait for someone else to talk to him first. Alex tends to not talk much and doesn’t dare to open up to talk to his friends. His social skills are very lacking because he is not confident. This lack of confidence dominates Alex’s behavior during learning activities at school.

How did Alex feel insecure?

To find out in detail what causes or triggers Alex’s unconfident behavior, we do psychological observations and diagnoses. After obtaining consent from both parents, the treatment process is continued. From the day of psychological observation and diagnosis, the following data were obtained:
  1. At home, Alex is often made fun of by his cousins
  2. Cousins ​​often look down on Alex
  3. Alex is made fun of for having a father who can’t walk normally because of illness
  4. My father is suffering from chronic diabetes and is in the process of being outpatient
  5. Alex is very close to Dad because he likes to stroke his head and hair
  6. Father and Mother are often involved in the conflict in dealing with this sick condition
  7. Alex’s father doesn’t want to be treated by his wife, even though Alex’s mother is a doctor
  8. Both parents often fight in front of Alex
  9. His parents are in the process of divorce
  10. Alex feels confused about who to go with
  11. At school, Alex prefers to be quiet, alone, and doesn’t talk to his friends
  12. Alex feels anxious and afraid to be at home in a situation where there is a conflict between his parents
From the data above, it can be concluded that Alex’s insecure behavior occurs because of conditions at home that often corner him. Alex is afraid that his cousin will make fun of him because his father is sick. This often-repeated event is deeply etched in Alex’s memory and feelings. So when Alex interacts with friends at school, he feels anxious and scared. Family conditions like this make Alex very insecure to interact with friends at school because he is afraid that it will happen again. Alex feels that his friends at school are the same as his cousins.

How to help Alex raise his confidence?

As parents and teachers, we have to explain openly to Alex about the current situation. That the separation of Alex’s parents is inevitable but must be faced. Alex is not alone in experiencing such a condition. Because there are many other children also experiencing the same condition as Alex. Both parents must apologize to Alex, if as a parent can not be the best example for him. Both parents must also explain in easy-to-understand language, why parents have to separate even though it is a tough decision. the habit of making fun of cousins ​​must be immediately resolved and stopped by bringing the two together. Parents can be a mediator between Alex and his cousin. Say that we should not say words that insult someone because of his illness. Because maybe we will experience pain similar to the person we make fun of. At school, the teacher or therapist also helps explain to Alex that his friends are good children. Not every child has the malicious intent to make fun of Alex. Teachers or therapy teach Alex to train himself to think positively. Even though the conditions at Alex’s house were having problems, it didn’t make Alex give up on the situation. Give motivation to Alex, to dare to rise to live his own life as well as possible. There is nothing that we can easily pass if we do not try seriously.

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